I'm not much of a crier...I never have been. I guess I should say, I'm not much of a crier compared to most girls. When all my friends were boo-hooing at "Titanic," I was laughing because I thought Leonardo Dicaprio looked like a rat sinking to the bottom of the ocean. Some things just don't hit that emotional chord for me like they do for other people. There are a few exceptions. When someone hurts my feelings, and I mean really hurts them, I cry. Whenever I think about Bethany graduating, I cry. But there are sometimes when I feel like crying, but I just tell myself to toughen up and not show my soft side. I'm so tired of that. Plus, it makes my throat hurt to hold back my crying. I don't like that either.
It's so funny that I have been thinking about crying, because in the book I'm reading, there is a chapter about it. It talks about how in our society, crying or showing emotion at all is a sign of weakness or vulnerability. But if we really feel emotionally attached to something, why should we hold back? Almost all of us know the shortest verse in the entire Bible..."Jesus wept." John 11:35. That verse, though short, says so much about the type of man Jesus was. He was human. He was not ashamed of his emotion, not ashamed of his tears. He did not try to hide from the crowd in order to cry...he didn't run to the bathroom or choke them back so his throat hurt...he let them out.
Blonde Britney and I often say we are a "package deal". We are always together, and we are so different in so many ways that we really balance each other out. Blonde Britney is the crier of the two of us. Sometimes she wishes she were more like me and let things roll off her back, but I wish I were more like her, not afraid to just LET IT OUT. I think I need to learn that I don't have to be so tough all the time. I guess I have a lot to learn from Jesus...and Blonde Britney.