No one ever said it was going to be easy...

This is the week that never ends. I feel like Monday was months ago. I know that part of it is the fact that Spring Break starts Friday...9 whole days without having to worry about pulmonary function tests, interstital lung disease, ICM quizzes, CSTA meetings, etc., etc., etc. I'm excited about spending a week at the beach with my family and some of my best friends. I plan on lots of tanning, shopping, seafood, and catching up on sleep and gossip. That is, if Friday will ever get here.

This week has been one of the most taxing I have had in a long time...physically, mentally, emotionally. My brain hates me for cramming so much information into it. My thighs hate me because I haven't been to the gym all week. My kidneys hate me for the fact that I am currently keeping Diet Coke in business. I have been coughing my head off all week; a sure sign that my immune system is preparing for epic failure. I am trying to talk it into not bailing on me for at least 2 more days. I am mentally spent, too. I couldn't tell you a lung from a heart right now, but I'm hoping that getting some sleep is going to help me sort out all the million details in my head.

On top of all this other business, earlier this week there was an emotional day for me. I found out that a very sweet girl I know passed away in a car accident, along with her 15 month old little boy. Brittany Shepard was a beautiful person on the inside and out. She was a model Christian, an elementary school teacher, pageant queen, and a fantastic mother. I cannot imagine what her family must be going through right now, but they are most definitely in my prayers, and I ask that you keep them in yours as well.

Life is so precious, and we are never promised tomorrow. Brittany was taken from this earth on a normal Monday afternoon after work. It could have just as easily been me or you. Our lives can change in the blink of an eye, and I feel like sometimes I just walk around in a daze. I feel like it's time for me to start living with a purpose and stop just going through the motions. There are so many things I want to do with my life, and I feel like now is as good a time as any to get started...as soon as I get my Pulmonary final over. I hope you all have a blessed rest of the week. <3

"Life is too short to wake up with regrets. Love the people who treat you right, forget the ones who don't, and believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said it'd be easy....they just promised it'd be worth it."

Just Keep Swimming...

I did it! I survived my first semester of medical school. If you can't tell by the lack of blogging I've been able to do, being a future doctor is rather time consuming. There really is no way to describe it to anyone who has never experienced it before. It's above and beyond anything I have ever experienced or could have ever imagined. I have never worked so hard in my life just to stay above water. I'm not going to lie and say there haven't been days...many days...that I have wondered if it was worth it or wanted to just throw in the towel. On those kind of days the two things that keep me going are 1) knowing that it will all pay off one day and 2) the people in my life. My family is supportive, as they have always been. They remind me of my capabilities and reassure me when I stop believing in myself. I have a fantastic, supportive boyfriend who understands that I can't come home every weekend or talk on the phone for hours at night. I have friends who tell me how much they believe in me. All these people love and support me unconditionally, even though they have no idea what I am going through.

There is a subset of people, however, who do know what I am going through. If not for those people, there would be no possible way I could ever make it here. It makes a difference to have someone to complain with, someone to help you when there are so many things you don't understand. They have been there for me to laugh with, cry to, to kick me in the butt when I am slacking, or to tell me to relax when I am on edge. They are also the people I let loose with when the studying is done--whether it is going out to dinner, concerts, sporting events, or just having a lazy movie night. In a way, it's like I have made a sort of family here. Sure, we may be a little dysfunctional, but we truly care about and want the best for one another. I believe with all my heart that these people will be some of my best friends for the rest of my life. I will be eternally thankful for them and all they have done for me <3

MS-1

So, it's been awhile...a long while...since I have had a chance to blog. On July 26th medical school started, and my life ended. Okay, not really...but I will have to say that school has been a hundred times more time-consuming than I had ever imagined. I've always been told you can't fathom it until you have experienced it, and now I can truly appreciate what those people meant! I have no doubt all this hard work is going to pay off one day, but it sure is stressful right now! The picture below is from my white coat ceremony on August 15th. That day was so surreal. I think sometimes it still hasn't sunk in that I am actually in medical school. I had an entire row of people here to see me that day. A special thanks to: Mom, Dad (even though he had a stomach virus and couldn't come to the actual ceremony), Bethany, Baylee, Ashton, Erin, Jerry, Aunt Glenda, Laura, Lane, Lake, Aunt Di, Uncle Jerry, Tim, Logan, Keely, and Lisa. You guys will never understand how much it meant to have you here!

Our medical school class includes some amazing people. I know I have already met people who will be my life-long friends. We work well together and we definitely keep things interesting! It's time for some sleep now...it's hard to come by these days. Thanks for reading, and please keep us all in your prayers this week, as our first test looms on Friday morning. The good news is that I am beach bound as soon as the test is over! Hooray for a long weekend and college football season! War Eagle!

Moving On...

Moving sucks. I have always hated it...and it's not just the fact that I am moving from the third floor at Creekside to the third floor at my new apartment (Dad was super excited when he discovered this); moving is always a bittersweet process, and this one will be no different.

I am really excited about moving to Birmingham. I have a fantastic roommate who is one of my very best friends. We have a really cute apartment in a place where I feel safe. Most importantly, I can finally begin to see all my hard work paying off. I've worked toward this since high school when I decided I wanted to pursue a career in medicine. My dream is coming true, and it is an awesome feeling.

However, I am also sad to leave Auburn. It is a wonderful place to live. It is so easy to take things for granted when you have access to them everyday...Pannie George's, for example! I have made some great memories and some great friends in Auburn. Wednesday nights at the Q will serve as some of the best times I had in college. Tailgating, having porch nights, cheap movie nights, and study break runs to Daylight Donuts or Cold Stone (until it closed...I'm still scarred). I also gained a new "family" this past year in an unlikely place--New Site, Alabama. There are some really special people there...people that remind you what being a good person is all about...people that will take you into their family and treat you like they have known you all their lives...people who will be there for you when you need them, no matter what time of day or night. My time with them won't be as frequent next year, but I will always stay in touch and never forget everything they have done for me.

In my old and wise years, I have begun to think people are lot like moving...you have to separate them into boxes. Your favorite things/your necessities...these things will always be with you, no matter where life takes you. Then there are the things you'd kind of like to keep around...just in case. They aren't things you need on a daily basis, but you know they will be there when you need them...and finally, some things seem to just get in the way and cause you more stress than they are worth. That stuff goes into the "Trash" pile :) I encourage you to survey the people in your life...and think about which box they really belong in.

In closing, I ask that you pray for our safety as we travel this weekend. Also, pray that my Dad doesn't talk me into leaving my furniture in Auburn and just sleeping on an air mattress in Birmingham...

Let Go and Let God

The song I have had stuck in my head for the past few days is a very fitting one for me. It is "Unanswered Prayers" by Garth Brooks. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in telling God what He needs to do and how He needs to do it, that I forget that He is the one in control of my life. You know, it's funny, when I look back on my life and some of the things I have prayed for, I know that if some of those things had come true, my life would be very different than it is today. I find comfort in knowing that one day, I'm going to look back on today...and know that everything that was going on in my life had a purpose. It's hard for me right now to see what that purpose is, but I am confident that there is one.

I'm a big fan of the song "Something Beautiful" by NeedToBreathe. I think it's because that's kind of how I have always envisioned my life--beautiful. I want an awesome husband who I am totally in love with...I want children, and I was to raise them in a Godly home. I want to be in love with my job and really make an impact on people's lives. I know that sounds like a lot to ask for, but is it really? I don't want to sound conceited but I think I deserve that! So one day when I have all that, I hope I can appreciate the bumps along the road to it!

Changing the subject now, I had a fantastic weekend! Friday night we had a sleepover at the cabin...Bethany, Ashton, Amellia, and I. We have a way of making any random night the most fun. I am so very blessed with the best friends. Saturday Bethany, Baylee, Ashton, and I met Tiff and her family in Destin and went to Big Kahunas for the day! Aside from Ashton's stalker, Ashton and Bethany wiping out, Ashton not having her ID...now that I look back, I think most of the problem's of the day were Ashton's...we had a really fun day! We went back to Tiff's condo and showered and met my parents at the Crab Trap for dinner. Today I spent some time with my grandparents and with my Dad to celebrate Father's Day. I am so blessed to have a Dad who has supported me in everything. As I have said before, I would never be where I am today without his emotional and financial support and encouragement. I love you Dad!!

In closing, I have a special prayer request. My Mom's mother, my Granny, has recently found out a leaky valve she has had for awhile is getting worse. If she doesn't have surgery to repair it, she is going to progressively get worse. She has decided to have the surgery, in hopes of improving her quality of life. She is in such good spirits about it...so optimistic. She has already overcome a stroke, a severely broken leg, and many other health problems. She is such a fighter! I hope to be like that one day. I am so proud of her. Your prayers would be greatly appreciated!

In closing, I just want to thank my friends...you know who you are...I couldn't get through life without y'all. You always know what to say or do to make me feel good or laugh. God truly blessed me with you guys. I love you! :)

Summer's Halfway Over!

So it has been awhile since I had a chance to blog...I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off. So much for having a summer break! In all honesty, a lot of my "running around" has been fun stuff, though. Blonde Britney, Brooke, Tate, Drew, and I made a trip to Six Flags to celebrate finals being over. Brooke's brother met us there and we had a fun day of roller coasters...until the rain started...or should I say monsoon? We got to ride all the big coasters though. The park wasn't very crowded since the forecast called for an 80% chance of rain! The picture above was taken while we were waiting in line for Batman!

After the Six Flags trip, it was time for Bethany's high school graduation! I was very proud of myself...I didn't shed a single tear. I think deep down I know things are about to get a lot better for her. She's going to a great school (even if it is Bama) and she is going to have some great times there. I am very proud of her and all the things she has accomplished, but it's on to bigger and better. Here's a picture of us after graduation!

Next stop after graduation...tattoo parlor. Yes, you heard right. I got a tattoo. I still can't believe it either. It is something that is very special to me, though. Bethany and I both got tattoos of bumble bees...get it? Our names start with the letter B :) We told Baylee when she gets older she has to get the same one...we are still convincing her :) My sisters are the most important people in the world to me. We are SO close, and now we have something that will bond us together forever...because it's permanent...I'm still having problems coming to grips with that, too. But I do like it and I don't regret it. It didn't even hurt too bad, and I am absolutely terrified of needles. I was a big girl, though. I asked the tattoo artist for a sticker for being sweet...as you can tell from the picture, he wasn't very amused....

Last stop on our tour of my summer...BAMA JAM. This was the first time I had ever been to BamaJam, and boy was it an experience! I saw some interesting characters...caught up with some old friends...heard some great music...and have a few funny stories to tell. Although some people may view BamaJam as a big redneck festival (okay, somewhat true), they should remember it is just for fun. People wear cut-off denim shorts, cowboy boots, and plaid shirts because it's FUN. You actually look out of place if you don't have on something a little bit redneck. I'd like to give a shout out to Hope for letting me borrow her cowgirl boots :) They gave me a few blisters, but what the heck? They looked cute, anyway. I would also like to go on record as saying I did not participate in any mud or Jello wrestling events while said boots were being worn. While at BamaJam, I saw my future husband Kenny Chesney for the first time...he didn't disappoint! Train also put on a great show. If you get the chance to go next year, do it! It's something everyone should experience at least once. I hope everyone is having a fantastic summer! :o)

All Good Things...

I don't want to talk about it...I don't even want to think about it really, but I know it will probably make me feel better so here it goes...softball season is over. And for the first time, looking forward to next season isn't an option for us or six other amazing young ladies. Getting put out at Regionals isn't what any of us wanted or expected. I can't tell you why it happened. I wish I knew, but so often I don't have the answers to questions like that. What I do know, however, is that I could not be more proud to be called a Kinston Bulldog. I would take being a fan of this team over whatever team wins the state championship. This year has been one filled with adversity, questions, and trying times, but the way this group of girls has fought through that and banded together to attempt to achieve a common goal has made me so thankful to be associated with them. For the Senior class, it is heart-breaking to end your career on a sour note, but I encourage you to remember all the fun times and awesome memories we have since your 7th grade year, which was my Senior year. Girls, that is the year that we put Kinston Softball on the map! We surprised everyone by beating Ariton on their home turf, then beating JU Blacksher in Kinston and making our first ever trip to Montgomery. You cannot begin to understand how much it meant to me that y'all did not quit on me after we got a disappointing second place trophy at the area tournament.
Be forever grateful that you had the opportunity to win a state championship ring. There aren't many people who can say that! I'd like to take a second to say something about each one of the Seniors, who will be greatly missed next year.

• Tiffany Wingard #16-Tiff, you moved here after I graduated to join this team so I never really got the chance to know you that well. You have been moved ALL over the field, from SS to third to catcher to left field, but you never complained. Your hitting improved leaps and bounds from last year to this year, and I know you worked hard on it in the off-season. You are a sweet girl, Tiff. Never lose your team player attitude!
• Amanda Crohn #2-Amanda, you also moved to Kinston after I graduated, but my family has grown to love you! You are such a good-hearted, sweet person. I remember when you first moved here and you were so intimidated by Ronnie and you just cried and cried and cried when he hurt your feelings :( But your skin thinkened and you have grown into an amazing softball player and I know you are gonna do great things in college. You are FULL OUT, WIDE OPEN all the time. I love that about you.
• Tasha Jones #10-Tasha, you were a huge part of the success of my Senior year. You and I ruled the right side of the field over there. :) My mom and your mom are two of the loudest, craziest fans anyone from the other teams have ever seen with those megaphones and shakers. I will never forget in the state championship game against Pleasant Home I was sitting with Mr. Coale. We were down and you had a base hit to right field to score two runs. I thought Mr. Coale was going to tackle me. I just remember him screaming "It's DOWN. It's DOWN!" You have been a huge part of this program ever since your 7th grade year, and it's going to be very weird with you not being there next year.
• Amber Jacobs #9-AJ, I'm so glad you decided to come back and play your Senior year. You did an awesome job in center field and I'm glad you finally got to get that homerun! You were also a member of the team when I played, and you have come such a long way since then. My favorite memory of your career is you catching that very last out against Pleasant Home in the championship game. The look on your face was shock and excitement. You slammed that ball into the ground and started jumping up and down. I will never forget that moment as long as I live!
• Whitney Hercus #00-Whit, girl one day I hope you learn to run with both arms! HaHa, but seriously Whitney, you are one of the sweetest girls I know. You have the best heart, and we could always count on you to be there for Bethany, whether it was her nurse or her counselor in the dugout. You came through for us so many times when you were called on to hit in clutch situations! Your mom is right in there with my mom and Tina with those shakers and megaphones. It won't be the same next year and I know you and I have talked about that already. You have what it takes to succeed in life Whitney. Never settle for anything less than you deserve and keep your positive, cheerful attitude. It puts a smile on people's faces, and that is a hard thing to come by these days.
• Erin Shaw #4-Ewin, my Dad and I were talking at the Elba tournament about how huge of a part you had played in the success of our softball program. You and Beth have come a long way from the old Liberty Belles days! I know that is only because of hard work and dedication. You are the kind of person who never goes at anything unless it's with your whole heart, and that is such a great quality to possess. I've already told you how much we appreciate the kind of friend you are to Bethany, but I don't know why we would ever doubt it for a second. I mean, you were wanting to bring her Kleenex to school in Kindergarten when she cried everyday. We should have known from that point that we could always count on you. I know that this is not the kind of season you and Beth had hoped for. As I said, I can't tell you why it had to turn out like this. Just know that the kind of person you are will be with you forever, while softball season had to end at some point. And the kind of person you are is going to take you anywhere you want to go in life! I know I will be seeing a lot of you since you and Beffy will be living together in college, so you won't be rid of me anytime soon. I love you, Erin!
• Bethany Holley #3-Here's where it gets hard. Beth, I first and foremost want you to know that playing softball with you my Senior year is what brought us to be as close as we are today. It moved us from that fussy sibling rivalry stage to the I would do anything for you stage. If that were the only benefit I had ever gotten from Kinston Softball, it would be enough. I know that softball being over is on a totally different level for you than it was for me as a senior, and I loved softball. Beth, the number of hours you have put into softball are COUNTLESS. I don't think people really understand the sacrifices you have made to get better, for yourself and for your team. Anyone who has anything bad to say about you, your work ethic, or your team-player attitude should be ashamed of themselves. For people to question your motives, to think that for one second you are a selfish person, it makes me furious. We will never fully understand the things that have happened to you throughout your career, Beth. Tearing your ACL, the way this season has gone, losing to Waterloo that year in the semi-finals...I won't lie, sometimes I have questioned God's motives behind all those things. I know I shouldn't and that all things happen for a reason but sometimes I can't help it. But memories of your softball career, all the way back from the Enteprise Rec League days, are some of our families best memories. We have made so many great friends through your travel ball days--The Phillips (even if they ARE from Ariton), the Byrds (even if they ARE from Pleasant Home)...just kidding guys...The Rowlands...Ronnie and Dawn...the Smartts...Uncle Sammy...the list goes on and on. All those people will be our life-long friends, and those people know the kind of person you are and they have so much respect for you. I will never forget traveling all over the southeast to watch you play...from the days you were so little that all you could really do was bunt...to watching you ripping balls to the fence in high school. I have watched you go from being scared senseless pitching against Vestavia Hills in the 7th grade, to being a strong, confident athlete who knew she could pitch against any team in this state. You have received some much deserved awards like All-State, State All-Tournament Team, the list goes on and on. The picture we have of you kissing that state championship trophy says it all. I have seen you do some very selfless things over your career, letting others be in the spotlight, taking yourself out of games when you knew your pitching wasn't going to cut it anymore. I know you ARE a team player Bethany, and anyone who has played with you could not argue with that. It's going to be a huge void in all of our lives not having that #3 on the field next season...it's hard to imagine Bethany Holley not playing softball. Bethany Holley IS softball. But Bethany Holley is a lot of other things too. You remember how I told you that after softball was over, all your other great qualities would still be hanging around? I was right: You are still beautiful, you are still intelligent (most of the time), you still have a great personality, you are still a generous, loving person, and you are still my hero. I love you more than life itself Bethany. You are my sister, and you are my best friend.